“If you want to be happy, be” – Leo Tolstoy
I have come to the conclusion that there are some people in this world who are just determined to be miserable and unhappy. I don’t mean people suffering from clinical depressions or those fighting a seemingly never ending misery. No. I mean those people that seem to want to be forever miserable and who seem to enjoy being surrounded by grief and failure. These folk find negativity in everything and are never cheerful.
However, there are also people who appear doggedly determined to be happy no matter what life throws at them. These people always make the best of everything, despite everything.
I know people in each of these camps. But why is there such a difference?
Happiness is a state of mind. Unless you are clinically depressed, you can just decide to be happy. Happiness is brought about by positive thoughts. The problem is that, unchecked, many people find it easy to sink into a pattern of negative thoughts and negative inner speak. This works to make us miserable, more stressed, tired and overwhelmed.
However, if we choose to stop following our negative thoughts and to make our inner speak positive instead, it has a remarkable effect on our demeanour. A positive mental attitude lifts your mood, makes you feel more motivated, energetic, happier and generally makes everything seem better than before.
“Happiness is a habit – cultivate it.” – Elbert Hybbard
Changing your inner speak from negative to positive is not easy. Let’s face it, not much in life worth having is easy. But if it’s worth having, it’s worth working for.
So why do so many people seem to choose to have a negative attitude? Maybe because it’s easier to think that someone else just has it better than we do rather than taking the responsibility for our actions and admitting that we could do a lot more to help ourselves? The grass is always greener on the other side, but that doesn’t mean it tastes better.
Every one of us faces many challenges during our lifetime. And just because someone seems to be having a good time right now, it may be that they are just coming to the end of a major crisis, or perhaps they are about to head into another one! We never know exactly what goes on in someone else’s life.
So rather than wish your lot in life was different, decide to do something with your own. Think positively. Train your mind to be happy. Wearing a smile, however false, actually fools your body into thinking that you are happy. This causes the release of “feel good” endorphins, which then make the happy state a self fulfilling prophecy.
So do you want to be happy or not? The choice is yours. Decide to be happy. After all, why wouldn’t you?